Right Where I am Supposed to Be

I started the post last week when I was having a moment of complete gratitude. Then then the weekend hit and my feeling got unhinged. Monday was, well, exactly as one would expect Monday to go. The complete opposite of the feeling the picture below creates.

 

Summer, you  let old man winter push you around again and only graced us with your glorious presence for a short time. We made the most it. Fantastic smiles from time spent with friends and cousins in the beautiful sunshine accompanied by too many hamburgers, hot dogs and s'mores.  Perfect.

 

The summer included birthdays, Jack is now a teenager though still not overly acting like one (*sign of the cross*) and Kamden is 10.  Time flies.

Kamden is trying his hand at tackle football this fall. He was pretty anxious, as was mom, but it's going really well.  

This picture cracks me up. His face. White pants to practice on a grassy, muddy field...so funny. Oh wait, no, that's a reminder to buy stock in a laundry stain removal company.

 

This boy of mine is a conundrum. So happy and easy going by day, by night, anxious and full of fear. That is the cause of my Monday blahs, this.

 

It's hard to watch him struggle.  In this, we are in new territory.  My arsenal of possible tools is quickly running dry.  We are in the process of seeking help but in what is typical of my style, I think, just one more day and we'll be through the worst.

It involves many peaks and valleys. All I want is my happy go lucky boy back.

Yesterday, if at all possible.

 

I am so very grateful that I am not doing this alone.  Also, what I wouldn't give to be back on that beach in Jamaica right at this moment. Oops, sorry, not being overly grateful, really, am I?

September has arrived with crisp mornings and falling leaves just in time for school. The boys were less than impressed with the arrival of the first day of school but have settled in nicely.

Grade 8 for this young man and grade 5 for his brother. As has become typical in the last couple of years, the first day of school photos have more outtakes than goodtakes but I kind of love it like that.

These two can make me laugh like no one else.

 

 

   

 

And that's what I will hold onto as we weather this minor storm because I am right where I am supposed to be.

Happy 12th Birthday Jack!

It's hard to believe that this little guy is now twelve. Twelve.

I kind of miss those glasses but I know he doesn't. 

 

One more.  He's changed so much yet he still looks like this guy, just an older version.

 

 

 

Dear Jack,

 

Happy birthday buddy! I know you no longer like to have a huge deal made out of this day but like I told you many times last week, it's a special day and because we love you, we are going to make somewhat of a deal of it. 

I think the cake I made where I accidentally used baking soda instead of baking powder (a whole tablespoon of it) really shows you how much I love you, no? Or maybe it was more when I threw that horrid tasting cake out and made a new one?

Thanks for helping me with the second one to make sure I got it right.

You are growing up to be a really great person.  You are kind and loyal and quick to hug your mom.  I like that, you know.

This year brought you new challenges.  Your first reaction to something new is usually that you would rather not try it, thankyouverymuch.

I know this is part of who you are and you can't change it any more than you could change the size of your nose. I get that.

I also know, from my considerable years of experience (cough, cough) that as your mom, I can't let you sit everything out because of this gut reaction.

You and I came to heads on this a couple of times this year.  One resulted in this:




That's you at the ski hill having the time of your life. The reason? Because you tried it, even though you didn't really want to and because you tried it, you found out you love it.

 

No, I don't get tired of being right, why do you ask?

 

And then yesterday, there was an outdoor ed trip with school. Again, you didn't want to go but mean old mom made you. I knew parts of it would not necessarily be your thing but I also knew you would have fun most of the day.

 

So yeah, sorry about that getting swamped in the canoe thing first thing in the morning, I didn't foresee that, I promise.  You handled it very well and Dad and I are so proud of you.  You could have thrown your hands up and said, "See Mom, I told you this would suck!".  Instead you changed into your swim trucks and had fun.

 

 

It's been a great year, dude.  Academically you continue to excel.  You work hard at school and while most things come easy, you still put in a full effort and do all your work on time. 

 

You have a great group of friends. You chose well there, kiddo. Good friends are a gift to be treasured. As you know, not everyone is as kind, fun and generous as your group of guys.

 

Your Dad and I couldn't be prouder of who you are.  We love you and are privileged to walk by your side as you grown into the man you will become.

 

Love Mom and Dad

It's Official, Skiing is our Sport

A few weeks ago, I mentioned that we took the boys for their first downhill skiing experience.

It was all in preparation for a school trip Jack was making.  He was anxious about it and in usual fashion for a kid who is not keen to try new things, he didn't even want to go.

In an attempt to forgo the lifelong commitment to this adage (because are you kidding me? Life is too short not to try new things!), we were making him go.  To ease his fears, we took both boys a couple weeks before the school trip so he would have some experience under his belt. We had a semi-private lesson for an hour and within that hour, both boys were turning nicely.  We skied the rest of the afternoon in the bitter cold and called it a success.

A few weeks later, Jack wanted to go again so we loaded up and headed out. This time we brought one of Jack's friends too.  He had tried snowboarding on the first school trip and wanted to try skiing.  We had about a half hour before the lesson so I took him through the basics and by the time the instructor arrived, all three boys were ready to head up the chair for more of a challenge.

 

Jack and his friend were good to go, no issues.  Kamden gets very nervous when we add a bit of a steeper incline.  He was not impressed with the whole situation.  I believe the words, "I HATE this" were uttered on more than one occasion.  A sport he doesn't like, who knew?

 

 

So we sent Jack and his friend for one more run with the instructor and Kamden went in for a break.  Then we tried again and it was no better.  And finally he had had enough and Jay took him back to the bunny hill while I skied with the older boys off the chair.  We even did a blue run and they both rocked it.

 

 

I am not worried.  He'll get there.  I was the same when I started.  Ornery and mouthy and angry.  I was also five and missing my two front teeth.  My parents laugh about it now (and probably then too - picture a toothless five year old yelling!) but I guess I'll add that to the tab of a million things I owe them for.

 

You know that Joe Pesci Snickers commercial?  That pretty much sums it up, just replace hungry with skiing.

 

 

On Wednesday he went skiing again with the school and came home asking when he could go again.

 

On Saturday we checked out our local ski shop and scored helmets at a steal of a deal.  Jack (and maybe me too) were so excited about the new helmets, we had to head out to the hill Sunday to try them out.  Kamden had soccer and was more than relieved he didn't have to go.  Jack and I headed out for the day.

 

 

We had a great day together.  He tried to pull his stuck in a rut routine (he is by nature, extremly habitual) by doing the one and only green run (it's a small resort) over and over but I wasn't having any of that.  And after one mild protest, he agreed that we would mix it up with a blue run every now and then.  It helped that it was easier to get to the lodge from the blue run than the green run.  

 

He had a smile on the whole day.  My heart was nearly bursting.

 

A sport he likes? That he is already talking about doing again this weekend?

 

We hit the jack pot (pun not originally intended but ha....).

 

I am equally excited.  I am not sure if it's because I have always loved skiing (true story) or because he is so excited about it. I think it's a combination of the two.

 

I was teasing him by asking if I looked like some of the pros we would see from the lift and he was polite but firm, "Mom, you are good, but not that good."

 

Naturally I made him video me so I could see for myself.  He's right.  I am not bad but I am no professional. And my stop made me laugh out loud.  Videos of both myself and Jack are here if you are so inclined.

 

We are scoping out equipment and have booked a hotel near Panorama, BC over New Year's next year. Grams and Pop may even come, it's been years since they skied and it's about time.

 

We are going to be a skiing family! Kamden is overjoyed.

What We've Been Up To

Tap, tap, tap...blows off dust. So, a month has gone by again. Remember when I used to blog every day? Yeah me too. *shudders involuntarily*

We've been busy here at the Lahti house.

My camera has been in overdrive with some fall photo shoots.  I even forced my own two men to pose.

 

Mostly they were happy to.  You will see what I mean later.

 

 

Jack is having a good year in grade 6.  He's also continuing in piano and enjoying private lessons much more than the class he attended up until last year.  Who doesn't love one on one instruction?

 

However, the one downside is that we discovered there is a situation that has been ongoing since sometime last year at school.  It's helped us to understand where his behaviour at home has been coming from. Naturally I feel like an arse because our approach was so, so wrong.  I am so glad it's come out and we can deal with it in a more appropriate manner.

 

I love this kid more than words can say.  He has so many many amazing qualities and I think one of his classmates put it best in their nomination of Jack to win the award for Respect this month at school:

 

"I nominate Jack because he never makes fun of other people."

 

Hmmm.  So what you are confirming is that other kids in the class do.  Duly noted.  And to all you kids who make fun of other kids, just wait until you are an adult and your peers finally figure out that the reason you did that was because you didn't like yourself all that much and it was the only way to make yourself feel better.  Uh huh.  See how far that gets you in the real world.

 

Meanwhile Jack will be travelling through time in the machine he invented because he spent his time learning in school instead of being a complete butt head.

 



 

Then there is Kamden.  I love this photo because is shows his crazy, fun, make us laugh regularly side.  This year he is continuing his love of all things sports.  He played touch football earlier in the fall and is now fully entrenched in the indoor soccer season.

 

He moved up an age category this fall and had to go through assessments for the first time, though we were told that all kids in their first year would be in Division 2.  We took him to the assessments anyway because he will never pass up the opportunity to play.  Turns out he was selected for Division 1.  Talk about a moment of pride.  Long story short, his coach and the parents of the other boys selected for Division 1 decided to hold them back into Division 2 so the team could stay together with the coach.  This coach is half the reason Kamden is so good so it was an easy decision.

 

Kamden is also doing well in school.  And another moment of pride.  One of Kamden's soccer buddies is also in the other grade 3 class at school.  His mother informed me Monday that this child is being bullied by another child.  Hence where the "situation" came out with Jack. Another reason I do not believe in avoiding the discussion of difficult situations in front of the kids.  You just never know when something will spark a conversation that is important.  Anyway, I asked Kamden to seek out his buddy at recess and invite him and the bully to join him.  The bully "plays" with the buddy and tries to keep everyone away.  It seems to be working.  Crossing fingers.  This little guy is a bully for a reason and I just hope the school can work with the family to get to the root of the problem.  His behaviour makes me (an accountant!) think he is screaming out for help.

 

Long winded today, aren't I?

 

 

Okay, less yammering on about my wonderful kids (sorry but they are, can I help it?) and more pictures.  I told you my camera was busy.  This family is on their third year with me and I couldn't be happier to do photos for them.  Kamden is very successful in making this adorable guy laugh which is so helpful.

 

 

And guess what?  He is also very effective at getting Pop to smile too!  Score.  Now if we could just figure out how to have him in the same picture as Pop and also be behind the camera making Pop smile. 

 

 

Can't have everything, now can we?  At least all 11 of us are in the picture and looking at the camera.  About all we can ask for I think.  And it only took 120 shots to get this one good one.  I wish I were kidding.  A professional I am not.

 

 

My niece, Anna, was up for posing for many a shot and this is by far my favourite.  I told her to sit in the grass and instead she did this.  I think she may take over the family photographer gig in the very near future and in the meantime she can be my assistant.

 

 

The next day, we tried for a shot of the four of us. This one was one of the test shots I took before I forced the boys out to join us. It's not bad.

 

 

Minus the wind blown look I am sporting, I like this one too.  It will have to do as there is no way we'll get another session out of those two.

 

Christmas card photo done and calendar is nearly complete.   Two things off the list.

 

This past weekend, I did some maternity shots of my massage therapist/yoga instructor.  Personally, I think she is the hottest pregnant lady in the history of all pregnant ladies.  37.5 weeks and she looks that good?  If I had looked half as good at 5 months. By this point, I looked like I might explode if you poked my belly button.

 



 

I was encouraging her to get professional photos done but she wasn't sure. I offered because this had to be captured permanently.  I would have forced her if I had to.

 

 

I love my hobby.

 

 

*end monthly long winded blog post about nothing in particular*

 

PS I can point out 100 things wrong with each of my photos, so whatever you are thinking about them, yes, I know.  I am not a professional nor do I profess to be. 

June So Far

June, it's here and almost half over already. We've been busy. Kamden is playing both soccer and flag football. Here he is lining on the defensive line.  I don't actually know what I am talking about but I fooled you there, didn't I?

The day I brought my camera he got a tackle (ie ripped a flag off the ball carrier) in the first few minutes of the game.  He was also about 5 feet from me and my zoom lens.  When you look at the picture below, envision his arm extending above the top of the photo holding the yellow flag.  Then look at his face.  He was proud.

He also went to a birthday party and got his face painted.  Adorable, no?

Then we had a birthday.  Jack's 11th to be exact

This card had Phineus telling us what I breath smelled like.

I love the look on Kamden's face!

I found this book while browsing in the books with Jack. Kamden and I managed a covert operation to get it to Dad at the till without Jack's knowledge.  Mom's got some stealth.

Jack, being my son in every way, only wanted to invite three friends to his party plus his little bro. They battled with Nerf guns for three hours in between pizza and cake. Good choice Jack, good choice. Next up, Kamden's birthday.

Bathroom 2

The second bathroom finally is "finished".  The work has been done for months, but my part, hanging the pictures and such took this long.

Here is the bathroom before.  This picture makes it look way better, trust me.

Target  was my saviour.  This shower curtain is exactly what I was looking for and hunted high and low both locally and online to no avail.  When I was in Bismarck I found it.

And angels sang.

Well not really, it is just a shower curtain but I was pretty happy. As happy as you can be after your 12th straight hour of shopping anyway.

The one thing our house lacks is storage so every reno involves maximizing our

storage. This tall cabinet is very roomy.

And as always, I enlarge my own amateur photos to decorate. It's cheap and it makes me feel like my hobby is worth something.

These are from twilight at the lake.

And sunset at the lake - those colours are not photoshopped. I wouldn't even know how, I promise you.

And now I will  multi task - two posts in one.  Aren't you lucky?  Don't answer that.

Jack also had his piano recital this weekend.  I know I am bias but he sure is handsome. 

and that dimple....

Because I Doubt the Grandparents Check FB

As always, on my last post I received sweet, supportive comments. Thank you, you are a big part of why I will continue to use this space. It is nice to know that no matter how little I put into this, there will still be people interested in reading.

Now on to my much neglected camera. I haven't been spending much time with it lately and I have missed it. I did take some pictures of my neice doing gymnastics. But, for obvious reasons, those will not show up online on my watch. She was so fun to work with - holding your entire body weight up on your hands is hard work while waiting for Kami to get organized...

So yesterday I invaded the boys space while they played their DS's or as I like to refer to them, the crack cocaine for the under 14 crowd. We limit their time on there because seriously, there is so much more to life that Super Mario Brothers and Pokemon. Though if you talked them you might wonder if they know that.

My biggest pet peeve is how much kids today seem to spend on electronics. I judge. I shouldn't but I do. I get judged too so it's all fair, right?

I am going to sound so old now but when we were kids, we were outside. You remember that? Like the opposite of inside. Where there grass and trees and FRESH air are? Yeah. My kids, it's like pulling teeth to make them go outside. Actually, to be more specific, it's one of my boys that refuses to play outside.

"There's nothing to do."

Uh huh.

I show you what you can do, little darling. (That right there, one of my applications for Mother of the Year. I have many.)

So I limit their screen time. And the rest of the time, they play with their action figures in the living room. I love this but be darned if they aren't re-enacting the very video games they are not allowed to play to their heart's content.

You win some, you lose some.

To Push or Not To Push

My Jack.

I love my Jack.

He is smart, with an almost photographic memory. He has a quick wit and a keen eye for detail.

He is also stubborn. His own worst critic. Set in his ways (he's 10, I know you think this is not possible however, anyone who knows Jack completely understands what I am talking about).

He is, in so many ways, like me, (except for that memory thing, that comes straight from his grandaddy).

He challenges me daily. I go from feeling like I know him and how to be the best mother to him, to feeling like I am failing him and not giving him what he needs.

He is a good kid. I know this.

His first reaction to being presented with the opportunity to try something new, is no, absolutely not.

I don't get this on any level. I understand this is how he is made, that he can't really change it about himself. However, I cannot relate. Me, who this year, at age 37, has waterskiied, speed skated and snowboarded - all for the first time in my life.

The thing is, when we force him to try new things (except food, a whole other post, trust me) he likes whatever it might be nine times out of ten.

So do we push him every time?

(I literally don't have the energy)

Or do we let him choose?

I don't have the answer. Nor do I expect that anyone else does. I will keep flying by the seat of my pants on a wing and a prayer and hope the therapy bills (his and mine) don't rob us of our retirement savings.

PS. before you judge me for putting this out there on the Internet, I just want to clarify that I have conversations with him all the time about this very issue. None of this is anything I wouldn't say to him. But if you must judge, go for it, turnabout is fair play.

Growing Up J & K

A few years ago, longer ago that it seems (I am positive!) we repainted the boys' rooms. They each picked decals to stick up to decorate (we really go all Martha Stewart up in our house), Jack chose Cars and Kamden chose Toy Story.

At the time, they were what both were right into. Today, that has changed. Today, Jack started peeling them off. The topic came up a couple of days ago and I told them that if they wanted to remove them, they could. I know that growing up means changing tastes. Heck, I am no longer growing up (well the jury is actually still out on this one, I am predicting a hung jury - bets are still open, get in while the getting is good) and my tastes change.

They seemed surprised,which I found a bit funny. Go me, being all hip and proactive! (I am about 1 for 850 on that front so don't be jealous)

It's weird. Part of me thinks I should be all sad and nostalgic for those two little boys who once so loved the characters from those movies. But a much bigger part of me knows that this is a moment to rejoice in.

They are growing up.

And to be honest my reaction is, wow, this is cool. The next stage in this journey from boy to man. The journey that I get a front row seat on. It can be rough up here in the front (I have the war wounds to prove it - or are those from my clumsiness?) but hey, it comes with the territory.

And quite frankly, I would not have it any other way. This is exactly how it's supposed to be.

I am not, however, looking forward to when Star Wars the Clone Wars and Phinneas and Ferb are replaced by Selina Gomez(or whoever is hip or groovy or what are they even calling it now...groovy, how old am I?) or (this is hard to even type) (gasp!)
Lady Gaga.

Okay, maybe I am. Because if the Star Wars the Clone Wars stays, my house may become something akin to The Big Bang Theory.

Now that might be something to worry about.