Tuesday, May 29, 2012

May Roundup In Photos

Can anyone explain where May went? I think I blinked and now it's May 28th. What? We started out the month celebrating.

Love

I am now 38 years young. And two years closer to a big trip planned for the year I turn the big 4-0. It will be somewhere hot, sunny and involve beaches (Caribbean) and umbrella drinks. February or March 2014. Who's in?

Jay and I also celebrated our 13th wedding anniversary. Jay is not much for material things so instead of buying him clothes like I usually do, I made his favourite meal, meatloaf. I am not even kidding. He loves the meatloaf at Montana's and it's so good even I like it. So I did a quick search and found a recipe for Braised Mushroom Meatloaf and I coupled it with this meatloaf recipe, minus the carrot - too lazy to shred it.

And oh my word, you guys, it was amazing. And it was meatloaf. I swear.

Jay's Anniversary Meatloaf

And I don't even like mushrooms. Cooked button mushrooms make me want to hurl. So I used fancy mushrooms.  Not the ones the recipe called for but something kind whose name totally escapes me now.   They were good though.

I talk about food a lot, don't I?  I kind of like it.

Then there was Mother's day weekend.  I ran a 10k race that weekend and was slower than I liked and much slower than last year but I didn't almost lose my lunch at the finish line.  It was a very warm day and sunshine is my cryptonite so I finished in 1:01:45.  Not my best time but it was a good run and I never walked once.  And my lightening fast friend, Terry-Lyn walked back after she finished to run me in.  I gots me some awesome friends. 

And no pictures because our hubby's were both at flag football with our 7 yo sons.

We opted to see our mom's for Mother's day the next weekend.  In between Kamden's football game and practice.  Did I also mention he is playing soccer?  Dude is all about the sports.  Also, we have two calendars to try and keep track of everything.

After brunch with my mom and brother's family (Pop was out at the farm seeding), we took some snaps.
Grams and her "kids"

Oh Kamden, seriously, you of the funny poses.

Mom and Us

Me, my mom and my big bro - he is older anyway, taller, well, we's short in this famdamily.

Mom and Me

And here it is, the elusive shot of me and my mom. I am not sure if there are any others to be had out there.  (my hair is rather red, and clashes horribly with train car behind us but ah well)

Blossoms

I got my mom some flowers, because she loves them and I love Blossoms.  They did my wedding flowers and quite honestly, I have never seen another wedding bouquet that I loved as much as mine.

And that brings us to this past weekend. I took a quick solo trip back up to Saskatoon to run in the 10 k SK Marathon race with Jen

I picked up my race pack and was really excited to see that our numbers had our names on them.  Just like the big league races!  It's the little things that make me happy.

Jen ran such an amazing race.  She paced herself perfectly because someone, not mentioning any names, KAMI, didn't properly set her Garmin to display our pace.

Her goal time was around 1:10 and we finished strong in a time of 1:09:45.

She sprinted into the finish and as I ran with her, I was so proud of her that I got a bit teary.

Congratulations Jen, you did it!  I knew you could, never a doubt in my mind. I enjoyed it and can't wait to do it with you again next year.
SK Marathon 10k with Jen


Here we are post race, avoiding the pizza that was provided to racers once they finished.  Pizza?  At 9am?  No thank you.  (if you know me, pizza at anytime is a big no no, unless you like your eyes watering a half hour later)

And that is May.  Bring it June!  We have two birthdays and a whole lot of soccer and flag football to keep us occupied.

Friday, May 11, 2012

Emotional Purge

Pretty

A number of years back, there was an incident that still to this day make me ill to my stomach when I think back on it. I have never written about it because it was too raw, there were too many other people involved.   It's now been 6 years and I need to write about it.  This may change your opinion of me but it's part of me so out it goes.

It's the only time in my life that I have ever been looked at with such hate and vehemence. I won't forget that. EVER.

I'll start at the beginning.

About 6 years ago, I met a girl, about my age at a mutual friend's birthday party. She lived in the same city as us, had a child close to Kamden's age (at the time - babies they were!) and didn't know a lot of people as they were new to the city.

We hit it off and I invited her to be part of a splurge group I was part of. We were just finishing a round and had open spots.

It seemed perfect. A new friend, very exciting. I am not a very outgoing person and don't meet and hit it off with people that easily.

She brought another friend into the splurge and it all seemed to be going reasonably well. Though there were observances of eye rolling and such when some of us talked about our older children. I chalked it up to the fact that preschoolers just give more fodder than toddlers and thought, whatever, they'll understand later.

It was the first time in my life that I was part of a large group and felt comfortable.  The ladies were all wonderful, we had fun, we ate good food.

A well known fact about me, for those who know me, is that I am not a bubbly outgoing social butterfly.  Nope.  More of a wall flower, much more at ease in one on one or two on one situations.  Always have been like this and my children are every ounce the same.

After a while the fact that either of them could never bother to RSVP to a gathering was getting to many of us.  It was always requested.  Never once did it happen. Personally, I find such things rather rude and down right uncourteous.

People are busy yes, but too busy to write a one line email, c'mon.

I was quite subtle (oozing sarcasm) when they showed up at the gathering I  hosted having to frantically find chairs for them, I believe I even said, "oh I wasn't sure you would be coming as I never heard from you."  Oh yes, that subtle.

It was either too subtle or as became apparent later, they just thought the whole idea of RSVPing was so not 2006. 

Then came the kicker.  The event that triggered a fall out that even the most pessimistic Kami could not have predicted.

A good friend was organizing a team for the an all night relay event for charity.  Naturally she invited the group to join.  Via email.

Most of us responded.  Via email.  A foreign concept for 2006? I don't think so.

Long after the team was established, said girl asked if she could still be part of it.  The first question from the organizer was, didn't you get my emails?  She let her know that she wasn't sure at that point if we could add another but she would do her best.

I have no idea if this played a role in the fallout or not.  I had nothing to do with this part so probably  not.

Later, when it came to collecting the money, again, no response from this same, now infamous girl.

By this point I had it.  I mean REALLY? Is common courtesy gone by the wayside?

The funny thing is that in person, she oozed friendliness and courtesy. 

*Cough*  "Act* *Cough* *FAKE* *Cough*

Sorry, there I go again. I guess I still haven't learned my lesson.

I made a comment in an email to the team thanking the friend who had done all the work to organize us and collect the money to deliver.  It takes work to do this even when everyone is on their game and when they are not, well, it's more work topped with frustration.

The comment I made was something to the effect of thanks, who knew it would be this much work to organize a bunch of adults.

Was it the truth? Damn straight.

Was it okay to say?  Probably not.  And I was told as much by one person.

All in all, it wasn't the best way to handle an already bad situation.

During the charity event I sensed serious animosity from said girl.  I wasn't surprised, I knew she wouldn't have liked my comment. Of course, THAT email she read.  Murphy!
The kicker though was at the end of the very long night (it was an all night event. ) I chased after her to give her something she had forgotten.

She looked at me with such hatred and venom that it still makes me ill to think about it.

I simply turned on my heel and walked away. I wasn't going to deal with at that point.  No sleep.  Not going to happen.

So I didn't deal with it.  The next group gathering was at her place the week following.  I wasn't going. I mean, why would I?  It was clear she loathed my guts. I wasn't putting myself through that.  Also I have zero ability to be fake and act like nothing is wrong.

Selfish.  Yes, because when I wasn't there, she attacked my good friend who had organized the whole thing.  In front of the entire group.

That's right folks.  I still cannot believe that happened.

And this friend is one of the nicest, most loyal people I know.  She did not deserve one word of the hate hurled at her.

I wasn't there so I only heard about it second hand.  But from people I love and trust.  It got ugly.  Like into the nitty gritty about about why she felt there was no reason to RSVP to the gatherings -  she didn't care how many people would come so why is it necessary.  Etc. Etc. Etc. 

I have not seen this girl since she looked at me with hate.  And if I never see her again, it will be too soon. The whole situation is not something I can ever forget.  Forgive sure, but forget, never.

She never turned up at another gathering, and if I recall right, her gathering was the end of a round.  I stayed in the group one more year but the whole thing left such a bad taste in my mouth and I was no  longer comfortable with the whole group setting.  I loved each and every one in the group, I just preferred to see them individually or in smaller groups. 

After writing all this, I am not sure what my point even is.  Just that it stays with me.  I think I understand why it all happened but I am just making assumptions about her that are either true or false but it helps me forgive her and myself.

It's over.

And I hope I have learned that stating the blunt truth is not the best option.

Peace out.