Thursday, November 30, 2006

Me thoughts

I haven't posted in awhile. Candace and I were discussing our week this morning on the phone. We had the same week despite not having seen each other all week. We decided that the brochures for motherhood proclaiming how glamourous and rewarding it is were, well WRONG.

Let me explain....

Our day from about 11:30 to 12:45pm:

"Jack, it's lunch time, what do you want, a sandwich, soup, grilled cheese..." continue to list every possible thing he would ever eat for lunch in the hopes that by 12 he'll have chosen at least one of them, while Kamden is whining, "me hungy, me need food."

While he's eating lunch I try the same thing with the snack for school,

"Jack, do you want a granola bar, breadsticks and cheese, yogurt....." on and on, until by the grace of God, he carefully selects something.....


"okay, great," I patiently say, "how about TODAY? What would you like today?"

Finally, by more of God's beautiful grace, he selects something.

"Okay Jack I guess you're finished eating."

I took the hint that yes, he was, since he was chasing his brother around the living room with both of them screaming at the top of their lungs while I was cleaning up the debris from Hurricane Kamden left in the kitchen.

I am VERY observant.

"Please put your patch away and go to the bathroom, we have to leave for school in 10 min."

Repeat over the very loud din in the living room several thousand times. 3 is a thousand when you are a Mom, at least it feels like it.

Finally, more of God's grace, and we are ready to head down and don the latest in Eskimo fashion.

"Jack, please get your ski pants on while I grab socks for Kamden."
"JACK, skipants, please!'
"JAAAACK, please put on your skiiiiiiipaaaaaaants."

Tuesday - he put EVERYTHING but his skipants on claiming I said boots. I must be going crazy, I would take an oath in court that I said skipants, several thousand times. Clearly, I had vodka on the rocks for lunch rather than grilled cheese and soup like the kids. Apparently I was so hammered I didn't know what I was saying.

Fine, let's just carry your skipants, we are driving to school today and you'll be heading straight inside. No, he HAD to take EVERYTHING off and put the @##@@## skipants on. Oh, and did I mention it's already 5 min to bell. We live close, but NOT that close.

Wednesday - after repeating the skipant song - had to make it into a song or else it's just me yelling the same thing over and over and over - thngs like this save me thousands in therapy costs - I start dressing Kamden to have Jack say,

"Mommy what did you say I should do first?"

It was more of God's grace that saved me from stringing him up by his precious little toenails!

And once we get Jack to school, I only have one to deal with. Cinch you might say. Ha! Have you met Stalin's direct decendent? Yeah, that's Kamden Jaymes. I have never met a two year old who thought he ruled the roost like Kamden.

Okay, that's a lie. I have. Jack. But he's not two anymore and we forget oh, so quickly. That's more of God's grace.

Yesterday Kamden decided that we should leave Jack at school by himself rather than picking him up. Kamden wanted to go home. Or should I say Stalin Jr?

That's just one example. I have a million others.

OKAY, so there were no brochures. But somehow, before I had kids that's what I envisioned. I must have had vodka on the rocks for lunch again. Apparently it's a recurring theme.....

Oh, and I have mentioned that we are experiencing a lovely ARTIC air mass right now. Actually it's probably warmer up at the North Pole right now than here.

The air temp is -20 which is bad enough but that's just the AIR temperature. Here, we are so very lucky that we get a lovely bonus called WINDCHILL. Basically it means that with the ARTIC gales it's -800.

And the Christmas tree farm, cut your own tree thing? Forget it. We'll be heading on a nice 5 min drive to our local Sobey's and "selecting" the finest in pre-cut trees from the warmth of our van.

Saturday, November 18, 2006

My list

1. I was named after a high school basketball player featured in the local paper.
2. I like my name.
3. So much that Kamden is named after me.
3. Both his first and middle names.
4. I'm Kami Jayne - I always spell my name when asked what it is - both first&last
5. He is Kamden Jaymes
6. Some think Jaymes is spelt with a Y because of Jay
7. But Jay is not his real name
8. It's short for JJ
9. Which is short for Johan Jason
10. He's the 3rd Johan in his family
11. His granddad was the first - Johan Ensio - called Jack
12. His dad is Johan Lloyd - goes by Lloyd
13. Our Jack is named after 3 people
14. Jay, and both Jay's grandfathers
15. He's Jack Johan
16. Apparently Jack is short for John
17. Why I cannot imagine
18. Johan is the Finnish version of John
19. Jack is really John John
20. We don't care
21. We named him that for very good reasons
22. It took me 20 lines to explain our names
23. I am supposed to be reviewing tasks right now
24. I often choke
25. Not on food
26. On spit
27. Jay no longer pays attention
28. I may die of choking because of this
29. But you likely can't die choking on spit
30. I hope
31. I like food
32. Especially chocolate
33. Also chips
34. Chicken wings, hamburgers, pasta with tomato sauce and sausage, BBQ ribs...
35. I could go on forever
36. I like food
37. I used to figure skate
38. I met my two oldest friends at the rink
39. Jack now takes Canskate at that same rink
40. Brings back lots of memories - Great memories and not so great
41. Skating taught me a lot about life - so did my coach, Danita
42. I used to own a horse
43. Actually I had 2
44. The first one liked to jump fences
45. We didn't like that
46. He was also an ass
47. Not a donkey, but a horse with an attitude problem
48. I replaced him with sweet Dixie
49. She was/is wonderful
50. I hope she is still alive and well with the people we sold her to
51. She once bucked me off
52. My dogs ran after her instead of making sure I was okay
53. They were very loyal
54. Max, the biggest dog, had to be put down a month before Jack was born
55. I was sad
56. He would have been so much fun for the kids
57. He was as a big a miniture horse
58. Only much cuter
59. People were scared of him due to his size
60. The only thing he ever got aggresive at were wasps
61. He hated them. He would snap at them with his mouth
62. Lucky for him wasn't very quick
63. He once killed a mouse though. It was an accident. He stepped on it. Poor mouse.
64. My parents still have Kricktet(I named her because she made a squeeking sound when she yawned as a puppy)
65. She worshiped the ground Max walked on
66. But now she gets all the attention
67. She likes that
68. I am allergic to cats and horses
69. But I wasn't allergic to my cat or my horse
70. I built up a resitance to them
71. My cat used to sleep on a pillow by my head
72. She still tries to sometimes
73. The thought of that makes me itchy
74. She is the most beautiful calico cat I have ever seen - she could be in those calendars but she thinks she's too cool
75. I like to laugh
76. Till I can't breathe
78. Those are priceless moments usually shared with really good friends
79. My aunt made me laugh
80. My mom is one of 15 kids
81. She's the youngest
82. My Auntie Vicki was her oldest sister
83. She died when I was pregnant with Jack
84. So did my Grandma
85. I guess death brings new life
86. Auntie Vicki used to call inanimate objects idiots
87. That still makes me laugh. I am chuckling now
88. You have to hear the tone she said it in too.
89. I can do a reasonably good imitation
90. I can't do it here though. Maybe one day I'll post a video here of my imitation
91. Wow, I thought this would be hard
92. Turns out I can talk for hours about myself
93. I wouldn't make a good date
94. Good thing Jay married me. Got me out of the dating pool!
95. He loves me unconditionally
96. Ditto for him
97. I always thought I would have a daughter
98. God thought otherwise
99. He was right. Sons are amazing
100.I love my sons unconditionally. They make me laugh and give me so much joy. They also like to test my patience on a daily basis. If I could ask for anything, I would ask for more patience. When God was handing it out I thought he said maintenance. I didn't need any then. I was a baby, everything was brand new.

Wow, if you are still reading this, you are so kind!

If you are reading this, comment. I have never gotten a comment from a stranger before. It would make my day. C'mon, do it. Make my day!

Thursday, November 16, 2006

Real or Fake?

Jay and I have been pondering whether to stay with our traditional fresh Christmas tree or to switch to the artificial ones that have the lights already attached.

The thing is, the light are EVENLY distributed all over the tree. That's appealing to me, being very picky about symmetry and all.

However, we have always had a real tree. My parents to this day continue to buy a real tree year after year. Theirs is always beautiful. Not always symmetrical but that's the risk you take buying something folded up into a long skinny stick and frozen to boot. It's always a surprise to see what the tree looks like once thawed.

We have had more than our share of Charlie Brown trees in the 7 or so years since we started buying real trees. Last year had to be the most pathetic tree EVER. We were jealous of Charlie Brown's little twig last year. I'd post a picture but pictures didn't do it's patheticness justice. It, unlike me, actually looked better in pictures... Go figure.

So we've been looking, comparing prices but have yet to make a decision.

I am still stuck on the lights. I am not a fan of stringing lights on the tree. I like putting up decorations. It's just like painting. I HATE the prep work (filling, sanding, taping.....Yelch!), LOVE the painting part. I like the part that is dramatic, the big finish shall we say.

Problem is, artificial trees look, well, artificial. But maybe if there 1000 lights, we won't notice? And they don't smell as good.

I do know we won't be going this route.

Monday, November 13, 2006

Kitchen, from bad to good

This was our kitchen one year and one month ago....

We had zero counter space and even with the pantry that was exactly where I was standing, very little storage space. To put it in perspective, I had one drawer. That's right, one drawer in the ENTIRE kitchen. Given that I am not the best at keeping things organized, it was not the best kitchen for me.

Not to mention the fake oak cubboards. Really stylin' let me tell you.

We'd been talking for years about installing new cubboards and last October we bit the bullet and did it. It was a long month and the laminate floor installation was a bit tense - I love you honey 'cause you did it!

This is our kitchen now.....


That's exactly what I said while cooking the first meal in it once it was complete. I have miles of counter space now thanks to Abe at Home Depot who suggested moving the sink to the corner. And way more storage space thanks to the pots and pan drawers and extra deep cubboard over the fridge. Abe rocks!

And I am so proud of Jay, who is learning as he goes and saving us big bucks! You rock too Honey!

Thursday, November 09, 2006


I just read Candace's post on how fleeting life is. How precious is every moment because it can all change in a heartbeat......

Kinda put my grumpy mood of the last 3 days in perspective. Thanks Candace.

I really have nothing to complain about and in fact was lamenting last night to Cathy and my Mom that I really have nothing to be grumpy about which in itself, makes being grumpy even more annoying. I went throught somethign similiar in the
summer when the rain wouldn't end. Can't blame it on the rain this time.... hey, wasn't that a Milli Vanilli song? And come to think of it, that would have been an excellent name for that post!

Now, it's in my head.... Milli Vanilli or not, it's in my head.

Perhaps I am rambling.... I am currently at an indoor play center that has, if you can believe it, free wireless internet. Okay so the $12 I paid to get us through the door likely includes it but hey, here I am, sitting by myself, with no whining children pestering me writing this very post.

Now, don't get me wrong, I LOVE my kids. They are both wonderful. Most of the time. The last three days have been out of the ordinary for them and me. Kamden is whiny all. the. time. Yesterday, everything he did ended in crying. Eating. Watching Bob (I needed him to watch Bob). Getting his coat on. Washing his hands..... You get the picture. Jack has been unusually uncooperative, but it could just be my mood too.

I was soooo happy when Jay arrived home from work. Finally, he could deal with Kamden because by this point, my patience was wearing thin... okay that's an understatement. The patieince was thinned beyond existence about 10:30 am.

It was a long. long. long. day.

Of course we all know Kamden is a mommy's boy so Dad really wasn't appealing to him. Darn it. Jay ended up taking him to Jack's Kindermusik class just to give me a 20 minute break.

Which brings me to why we are here, at the play center. Really it's simple. To keep Momma sane.

If Momma's happy, we all happy.

So much for the peace and quiet. Kamden wants lunch now...... Ah, we must take what we can get :-)

Sunday, November 05, 2006

Good friends = Good times

Warning: this may only be funny to a select few ie. Cathy and me:-)

This weekend I had some me time. The boys headed to Toon town to pick up a discarded TV - it was at least 10 inches bigger than either of the two we have so Jay was itching to get his hands on it. He is, as I type this, ripping appart the fake stone "fireplace" that holds our TV in the family room. DON'T ask. It was here when we moved in. We cannot be held responsible for other's decorating faux pas, only our own.

I worked all day yesterday and then stole my good friend Cathy away from her University homework for some girl time.

We hit Earl's for chicken wings and martini's - that HAS to be a good combination don't you think! Don't worry, I only had one as I was driving. Martini that is, I had many, many more than one chicken wing. Who can stop at one?

We decided to try something a bit different so we orderd some sushi. I know, what were we thinking? Sushi from Earl's could only be good in Vancouver or someplace within more than 1000 miles of the sea.... but I digress. The sushi came with some endema beans (not sure how to spell that). So I grab a few and start chewing... and chewing... and chewing.

Now I didn't want to be impolite because Cathy had said she'd had them before and really enjoyed them. However, I am usually a fairly honest person, sometimes brutally so. It gets me into trouble and maybe someday I'll learn but it seems to be an inate quality.

So when she asked how I liked them I commented that they were a bit chewy. Then she started thinking... do you eat the pod or, don't think so. Giggle giggle....

That explains the chewy part but then how do you explain the bean that went flying behind Cathy and narrowly missed a fellow patron? Oops....

A bit later I looked around and asked,

"When did Earl's become a teen hangout?"

"Um," Cathy replied, "those aren't teens. Many of them are in some of my classes at the University."

"Oh. Right. I knew that."

Apparently I am older than I imagine myself to be in my head. I guess when you are 32 and think you are 20 it's bound to happen sooner or later.

Leaving Earl's we were discussing tips. As in how much do you tip the waitress. I noted that 20% was our standard amount. Our bill was $22.00 each so Cathy asked how much that would be. I said oh, about $7 or 8. Remember I am the CA and she is the Kinesiology student who moonlights as a figure skating coach or vice versa, I'm not exactly sure.

"Are you sure?" she asked.

"Well, no, I need a calculator to do that so I always over estimate and I'm fine."

Hee hee. Too bad I went to school for so many years and have done so many calcs in my life it's insane but can't do simple math in my head. I blame it all on technology. It's whoever invented calculators who is at fault for my math inablilities. That and the fact that my beloved hubby is excellent at math in his head and handles those sorts of things when we are together. Which is most of the time....... boy do I know how to divert blame for my ineptitude or what! :-)

This conversation continued as we walked over to the coffee shop for an after dinner java. Finally she asked if I needed a peice of paper to figure it out.... then she figured it out for me. Oy. I need to go to Hooked on Phonics but the kind for math idiots. Either that or carry a calculator in my purse and sneak to the bathroom at opportune moments to hide my mathematical follies.

Later on we decided to play Scrabble. This is a great coffee shop that we frequent often, case in point. They have games. It wasn't going too well as it's very difficult to play Scrabble without the Scrabble dictionary - especially when you are as witty and intelligent as I am. This would require the ability to walk and chew gum at the same time....... never been good at that.

But when Cathy commented that she only had her X...... .I said, "Do you want my J?"

As in the letter J but she burst out laughing and after a few minutes (see, me really witty) I GOT it.

"OH, NO, you CAN'T have him. You can have my J tile though."

Good friends, friends that can laugh at you while still laughing with you.....