Way back in October, I had the crazy idea that I should pursue alternative methods to maintain my health. You will recall that I was advised, by a naturopathic doctor, to do an elimination diet, or as I like to refer to it, THAT diet. Wherein THAT is a four letter word uttered with much disgust and spit. I quit after only two weeks on account of feeling like crapola on a stick.
I thought that was the end of it. I already knew I was mildly lactose intolerant long before embarking on my very short journey into alternative medicine.
You might be thinking that I didn't give it enough of a chance. And you might be right but, humour me, okay?
So in the weeks after I re-introduced dairy accompanied by the most useful product known to man, Lactaid tablets, I realized that I am no longer mildly lactose intolerant. Now I am full on, hardcore, show no mercy lactose intolerant.
(insert profanity here)
Prior to THAT diet, I could eat a square of chocolate without Lactaid and have no ill effects. After, well, one square is enough to set my stomach into overdrive. Those who know me, know that Kami without chocolate is a fish without water. This fish is now land bound. And not happy about it neither.
It's as if the complete abstinence from diary for two weeks resulted in any natural enzymes to digest dairy that my body once possessed to disappear.
I know, I know, one does not need dairy to survive. However, life is for living and food is an integral part of living for me. Life without dairy is not a path I wish to embark on. Pizza, nachos, tacos, my favourite Greek chicken with feta, the list is endless. I am all for eating healthy but a girl's gotta treat herself every now and then.
Now that treat requires copious amounts of Lactaid.
I highly recommend you buy stock in the company.
(insert further profanity here)